Friday, July 15, 2005

Bugger

4th time isn't the charm. We got a call on Monday from our Social Worker, and the PERFECT situation had come up (therefore, it was doomed NOT to happen...)

A White Birth mother, 27, well educated, healthy, only smoked a few cigarettes a day, and a black birth father. 9 pound baby boy.

perfect.

She chose us, and 5 other families, and in order of selection, we were #3.

I was completely certain that it wouldn't work, but damn it all if I didn't allow myself to get the tiniest bit excited.

Today our SW calls to tell us that she did indeed pick the 1st family, a single mother. Oddly, the last one where the BM picked the other family, it was a single mother, too.

The BM is also struggling with the idea of parenting herself, so she's taking the weekend to decide.

I was going to get so much done today, as I called in sick, after suffering a head cold, and feeling kind of blah anyway, but I've just sat around, played playstation, and cooked.

I HAVE to do laundry, veggie chopping for salads, and some serious de-cluttering and house cleaning.

I won't be able to get much of that done tomorrow and Sunday, as Bobby finally closed on his apartment, and we have to tape out the walls for the painter on Sunday, plus his folks come Sunday night.

So I'm just feeling kind of depressed today. And angry with myself for taking the time to be a lazy butt, although, my therapist would say that my time being "good to myself" today was healthy - yeah, yeah, whatever....

I'm off to shul in aobut 45 minutes, and then perhaps I'll wander on over to a Barnes and Noble to catch all of the Harry Potter Excitement.

I forgot to reserve a book, but I'm hoping that there will be one available, and I'll ask Amy to send me the one from the UK as well.

3 comments:

Jen said...

Oh, Shelli, so many, many hugs to you. This is all just so unfair. If you want to come here and have us take care of you like you took care of us, the door is always open. Sushi, beer, chips & dip and gooood ice cream await you.

Lots of love to you and Narda,

J&C

S said...

Aw, fuck, Shelli-this totally sucks.

Dammit, it's so unfair, and I used all my white voodoo and everything.

OK, now I need to stop fucking around-we NEED to get together! I've got the 26th free, how 'bout you?

Heather said...

Sorry to hear this one didn't work out. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you.